The year is about to end. Two months shy and 2012 will be over. As I look back at the events of this year, I realized it had been filled with comings and goings – of people, to places and life in general.
January 2, 2012 – The year was just about to start. But we already experienced an ending. At 8:05 p.m., we bid goodbye to our family patriarch, my grandfather. His death was painful and sad. Never in my life have I thought of losing him. But days before his death, as I watched and saw him cry out in pain every time we move him, when even the simple effort of raising him up to feed him would make him cry out in pain and when even hugging us back is hard for him, I cried out to God to let His will happen and we are letting Tatay go. It was not easy. It was one of the hardest thing to do. I have loved Tatay my entire life. He and Nanay raised me up. They were like parents to me. And I never expected the multitude of people that would visit and pay their respect during Tatay’s wake. I will forever be grateful to God for using this people to provide us comfort and strength during those hard and sorrowful times.
June 9, 2012 – Four months after Tatay’s death, Nanay followed. Her death shake foundations of my being. Losing them in a year literally broke my heart. I always knew they loved each other so much, but I never thought that even until death, they would follow each other. I admire Nanay for her strength, and I praise God for His graces to our family – emotionally, physically and financially,that we were able to survive these challenges. Many of us are still coping with their deaths, I included. Many times, I would just stop whatever I am doing and think of Nanay, of what she will say at a certain scenario. Or I will look back at the times I spend with her – market day, family day, any random day and realized how special those days were.
I thank God everyday of my life for giving me the opportunity to grow under Nanay and Tatay’s watchful eyes. I may have been a little spoiled, a little bratty but I knew my limits. I knew love because God has used my grandparents for me to witness what love is. I knew forgiveness because God has channeled the lessons of forgiveness through them. I knew compassion, because God has given me a compassionate family.
Everyday of my life, I will keep in mind their lessons: ” Mahal, never turn your back on your Mama and Papa, on your sister and your cousins, especially the young ones. We may not be able to take care of them and see them grow, but we have taught you everything they need on love, family and respect. Give it to them.”
Rest well Nanay and Tatay. I know that God is waiting for you in His Kingdom.
Lord, accept my Nanay and Tatay. I know that they have lived on this Earth by your grace.
The Happier Side
God giveth and taketh
– that’s what I have realized. Amidst my sorrow in losing Nanay and Tatay, He gave me a ministry to nurture and take care of. He gave me Vessels of Christ Fellowship, together with its two sister ministries – MBC and Tungko.
Truly enough, God gives us everything we need, as long as we call upon Him and serve Him with all our hearts.